Poison
by Diztracshon
Summary: Chell got out, sure, but did she want to? Did it help? Sick in a hospital she misses what she left behind. Oneshot.


"I have a surprise for you after the next test," the electronic voice of GLaDOS crooned through the speakers. "I promise you will enjoy it."

Chell, of course, didn't say anything, opting instead to solve the puzzle she was in and hurrying into the lift. She had had more than her fair share of surprises in the facility, but GLaDOS had never told her about them before. She had promised that Chell would like it.

The elevator seemed far too slow, she wanted her surprise. It occurred to her as the elevator continued up that she may not enjoy the surprise. Maybe it was like the last one, but GLaDOS had promised, the computer wouldn't lie to her anymore, would it? After all they had been through together underground Chell was convinced that GLaDOS was telling the truth.

The room was dark like last time, there was a small light like last time that did nothing to pierce the darkness. It was the same as the last time, but it wasn't the same. Things were different now, Chell told herself, GLaDOS wouldn't be lying again.

"Please step into the light," the machine's voice came from somewhere in the room, but not the speakers, it sounded different here.

Chell stepped into the light, trying her hardest to keep her excitement inside, she didn't want GLaDOS to see her so happy. It was the same as last time but Chell was sure that it wouldn't turn out the same way.

With a loud click the lights all turned on and before her was a humanoid robot. She remembered the co-operative testing initiative, they hadn't looked like this. This robot was almost human, the only giveaways were the shine on the metal and the pure white of the thing.

The eyes shone yellow like GLaDOS'.

"What do you think?" the robot asked, it was the voice of GLaDOS she heard from the robot.

Chell didn't reply, but she let the smile on her face speak for her. She liked it and wouldn't have said why even if she could. The notion of the computer having hands and fingers, lips even. Limbs and an almost human form. It was… exciting.

Chell reached out to touch the robot but held herself back, GLaDOS might not appreciate that.

"I made this body so that I can touch you," GLaDOS told her. The robot reached out a hand and cupped Chell's face gently, the hand was warm somehow, it didn't feel metallic even though it looked it.

Chell reached out and touched the robot's face, this too was warm where it should have been cold and soft where it should have been hard. GLaDOS' robot body didn't feel at all like a robot as the machine pulled Chell closer.

The robot's lips pressed against her own, again warm and again soft where they should not have been. Chell let herself go, melting into the robot's embrace, into the arms of GLaDOS, with whom she had shared so much, most of it not good. It didn't matter then, it didn't matter that she had tried to kill the computer twice, it didn't matter that the computer had tried to kill her.

She couldn't think, eyes closed she didn't see either, but she could feel hands on her, feel the robot's lips and hands. She felt it all, warm, soft, gentle, sweet. It was everything Chell wanted it to be, everything she needed it to be.

She opened her eyes to the off white ceiling.

Everything except real.

Why was it always GLaDOS in dreams like that? Chell berated herself, it wasn't right, it should not have been GLaDOS, who had never been nice to her. But it wasn't true, GLaDOS had been nice, nicer than she had been to anyone else at least. Chell had lived through the enrichment centre and that was more than anyone had done for a long time.

Chell had disabled GLaDOS, set parts of her on fire, destroyed things, effectively killed the computer. But GLaDOS hadn't been angry about it, she had been sad. The computer had been bitter, sure enough, but she hadn't been angry. She hadn't tried to kill Chell just for that.

GLaDOS had tried to kill Chell for other reasons, so maybe their relationship hadn't been as good as Chell preferred to think. But GLaDOS had murdered everyone in the facility but for her. The computer hadn't tried to kill Chell until she tried to kill the computer.

She wished that GLaDOS had asked her to stay, and not just sent her up the elevator. If she could have spoken she would have asked to stay. She didn't mind testing if she could have stayed there with GLaDOS, but now the computer had those two robots. Chell wasn't necessary.

She curled up on the hospital bed and tried not to think about it.

It was dark around her, night had fallen, she wasn't used to the idea of night. There had been dark places in the enrichment centre, but there hadn't been night or day. There hadn't been much of a cycle. Or at least she'd never spent enough time awake to notice a cycle.

She was in a hospital because after she had found a road and walked long enough to get a lift anywhere she had passed out. She had been lucky, by all accounts, even another day and she would certainly have died. She didn't think this likely, another day would have meant she stayed longer in the enrichment centre, surely GLaDOS would have made her better.

Chell had blood poisoning like nothing they had ever seen by all accounts, some of the things in her blood had been unidentifiable, but it had all certainly been harmful. She had weak bones and she had tumours all throughout her body like cancer, but different. She even had radiation poisoning. She remembered the voice of Cave Johnson, talking about tumours and talking about some element that didn't like the human skeleton and talking about blood poisoning. It didn't take much to guess where the radiation had come from either.

But she couldn't tell anyone. No explanation had been offered by anyone as to why she didn't speak, no one suggested that she couldn't or that she wouldn't. No one had even mentioned the fact that she hadn't spoken a single word to anyone since she had been found.

All they did was try to help her, and she appreciated that. She couldn't talk, whether that was because she refused to or for some other reason she didn't know. No one, to her recollection, had ever tried to check. She didn't ever remember speaking so maybe she couldn't, but she didn't remember all that much from before she woke up so that she could test.

She remembered everything clearly since the first time she heard GLaDOS' voice, but little before that was clear. She couldn't remember a single person clearly and couldn't remember any conversations she may have had, or any interactions at all. But then she had woken and there was GLaDOS' voice.

That was probably it, Chell thought.

She didn't stay awake long, she never could now. She had no reason to be awake, no reason to be asleep, no reason to be alive. She didn't have anything but the enrichment centre, maybe if she had made it out the first time she could have had a life outside, but it was too late for her now, she knew she couldn't live outside the facility, and not just because of the poison in her veins.

She had no life outside and there was no changing that anymore, she didn't want to change it.

She wanted to go back. That was all she wanted, she wanted to be back in the enrichment centre, and so she dreamed about it. She dreamed about leaping through portals and solving GLaDOS' puzzles, she dreamed about the computer appreciating her efforts.

But had GLaDOS ever congratulated her? And with such a simple thought the dream was ruined and fell apart around her. The closest to a compliment the computer had ever come was 'say, you're good at murder'. From GLaDOS that was probably high praise.

Her throat was dry but she couldn't lift the glass on her bedside table. She was tired but no matter how much she slept she didn't feel better. No one had said so, but no one needed to, Chell knew she wasn't going to live. She knew she was going to die in that bed, and soon, and until then the only comfort she had were her dreams.

* * *

**A/N: **I wrote this a while ago, just as a test, and one day I will write some portal fanfic that doesn't end with Chell's death, hopefully.


End file.
